Well world, where do we go? I’m not talking about where I want YOU to go, I’m talking about myself. I have a college degree, I have no desire to do anything with it. I pretty much want to fuck off for the rest of my life, damn the consequences. I want to bang chicks at random. I want spend every night for the rest of my life in a bar. A cool bar, with hot girls. I don’t wanna give a shit about anything except for sports.
How do I get to this point. How can anyone care so little to have being a fuckup as their lifelong goal. I love the way I was built. I love myself and I’m not ashamed to admit it. How do I make the rest of the world love me as much as I love me? That maybe the better question.
Well the plan is simple enough, all I have to do is kill everyone in the world who doesn’t love me as much as I love me. I think it’s a pretty foolproof plan. Seriously what could go wrong? How to accomplish the task is where it gets a little bit tricky.
I could start stockpiling guns and ammo and knives and swords and flamethrowers and tanks and ninja stars and brooms and pitchforks and guns and grenades and bombs, but lets be honest that sounds like way too much work. I could create some kind of new lethal virus and end humanity that way, but I’m not that fucking smart.
I was also told I could learn to build Nuclear Weapons. I love this idea, not only could you kill the vast majority of mankind off with one push of the button, maybe the unfortunate survivors will turn into zombies, and you could also be the guy who started the Zombie Apocalypse. How fucking rad would that be? Pretty fucking rad. However once again I’m not smart enough to build a nuclear bomb, plus from everything I’ve learned in the 5 seconds I spent browsing the web, enriched Uranium is sort of hard to come by.
I’m starting to get pissed at my parents, every plan I come up with takes brains or endurance, I don’t have enough of either. I’ll come back to this plan later. I’m off to fap to donkey secks porn. Lataaaaaaaaaaaaa
